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Don't have much time to explain, because I should be in bed right now. But I just needed to say that I am so beyond emotonally drained right now.
- family squabbles over who's going to live where when my brother finally moves out of his place
- my cat is still missing
- I dream every night that I find my cat and then wake up to find that she's still gone
- I feel guilty for making my mom upset at her birthday party
- when I got home, I had no internet and I just broke. I cried, telling God that this was just too much - thankfully, God is amazing and handed me my internet back a couple minutes later, humbling me.
- people telling me what I should do when they so obviously have a vested interest in the outcome - and when I can't really trust them because they tend to enjoy causing drama (or at least have a compulsive drive to do so).
- sleeping like crap because I dream all night every night
- feeling like I'm a big fat blob who can't do anything right and isn't good enough for anything or anybody
So yeah. I'm tired.
Sometimes wish God would just send me an email being like, "Look, this is where you're doing the wrong thing. This is where you should be. Don't worry. I'm taking care of you."
Thankfully I've still got my faith. God's here. He's taking care of me. I just have to go through some shit right now. Just wish I could see the light at the end of this particular tunnel. Maybe I have a flashlight around here somewhere....
- family squabbles over who's going to live where when my brother finally moves out of his place
- my cat is still missing
- I dream every night that I find my cat and then wake up to find that she's still gone
- I feel guilty for making my mom upset at her birthday party
- when I got home, I had no internet and I just broke. I cried, telling God that this was just too much - thankfully, God is amazing and handed me my internet back a couple minutes later, humbling me.
- people telling me what I should do when they so obviously have a vested interest in the outcome - and when I can't really trust them because they tend to enjoy causing drama (or at least have a compulsive drive to do so).
- sleeping like crap because I dream all night every night
- feeling like I'm a big fat blob who can't do anything right and isn't good enough for anything or anybody
So yeah. I'm tired.
Sometimes wish God would just send me an email being like, "Look, this is where you're doing the wrong thing. This is where you should be. Don't worry. I'm taking care of you."
Thankfully I've still got my faith. God's here. He's taking care of me. I just have to go through some shit right now. Just wish I could see the light at the end of this particular tunnel. Maybe I have a flashlight around here somewhere....
