Broken (3) --- Kony

[failegaidin]

            They settled down to watch "Indian Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark." Tony had been appalled when he found out Kim had never seen it, and it was immediately put on their watch list. But his excitement was gone tonight, and Kim noticed the change. He had barely spoken to her, obviously lost in his thoughts. At one point she had reached over to lay a hand on his arm, but he had flinched so hard it was like a slap in the face.

            Her immediate reaction was to become just as cold, to say or do something that would hurt him back. But she had been working on her anger in therapy, and she knew that it would only cause more problems. And she really didn't want to hurt Tony – it was already killing her that something was bothering him and he wouldn't talk to her about it.

            Since they had moved in together, they had talked about everything. She had gone into more detail about Barry and the baby, and had talked to him constantly about her father and what had gone wrong between them. It had taken some time, but Tony had eventually told her about his time on the run, and then finally about Michelle. They cried a lot at first, and it had only strengthened the friendship they never thought would work.

            But now he was refusing to talk, and it was slowly eating away at Kim. She wanted to beg him to tell her, to turn off the movie and make him face whatever demon this was. But she was afraid he would pull away, distancing himself from her even further.

            As the opening credits finished, she moved closer to him, placing a kiss on his cheek before moving her mouth to his ear.

            "It'll be okay, Tony," she whispered.

            Not noticing the pained expression on his face, Kim snuggled against him, one arm draped around his torso. Tony closed his eyes at the fell of her body against his, his hand moving to settle on her hip automatically.

 

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            "Haven't seen you in awhile," Jack commented as they stood in the kitchen, cleaning up after the game was over.

            Tony shrugged. "Been busy."

            "What's wrong?"

            "Nothing."

            "You're lying."

            "Just leave it, Jack."

            "Tony-"

            "I said leave it."

            Jack turned the water off, then faced his friend. "No. Something is wrong. You've been in a shit mood for the past month, and I'm not the only one that's noticed. Kim says you won't tell her what's wrong either."

            "Well maybe Kim needs to mind her business."

            Jack moved quickly, grabbing the collar of Tony's shirt and pushing him up against the nearest wall.

            "Don't do that. Don't be mean to her just because you can't work out your own shit. You two are friends. She cares about you. Don't ruin that."

            Tony pushed him off. "Come off it, Jack. Nobody made you face your demons while you were mourning Teri."

            "Is that what this is about? Michelle?"

            "I don't want to talk about it!"

            Jack's shoulders slumped. "Tony, I thought we were friends."

            "We are," Tony gritted, unable to look him in the eye. "But that doesn't mean there aren't things I can't talk to you about."

            He surged forward then, moving toward the living room. Jack's hand shot out, clamping down on his arm and stopping him.

            "That's not true, Tony," he said quietly. "Nothing you tell me could make me stop being your friend. Nothing could make me think less of you."

            Tony looked at him then, and Jack was shocked at the pain he saw in his eyes.

            "I wouldn't bet on that, Jack."

            Pulling his arm back, he moved out of the kitchen and through the living room until he was out the door and back in his car.

 

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            Tony was starting to become a permanent fixture on Chloe's couch at all hours of the day and night. He would knock on her door, refusing her offers of making him a key, and then he would move into her living room silently, sitting down and staring at nothing.

            "Why do you keep coming here?" Chloe finally asked. "You hardly talk, and I know I'm not exactly a comforting presence."

            "I can't sit with her all day, watching her, feeling…I can't do it. It drives me crazy. And Jack…every time I see him I feel like I'm betraying him. If I don't come here…sitting here with you keeps me from going out and getting drunk again."

            Chloe nodded in understanding and took a seat next to him. "You're always welcome here, Tony. Even if it is awkward and I have no idea how to help you."

            He gave her the faintest of smiles. "Just you being here is enough, Chloe."

            She frowned, obviously struggling with her thoughts. "I think she has feelings for you."

            "Don't."

            "She does. I've seen the way she looks at you. It's…"

            "What?"

            "It's the way I look at Jack," she whispered.

            Tony looked over at her, reaching out and squeezing her hand. "You should tell him."

            "We're talking about you."

            "We'll go back to that after. You need to tell him. He-"

            "Stop."

            "He loves you, Chloe."
            "He can't."

            "He does."

            "No."

            "He told me. Point blank, Chloe. He loves you. He's just scared to death of losing you if you don't feel the same."

            She looked up at him defiantly. "I'll tell Jack when you tell Kim."

            He pulled his hand away. "That's not fair."

            "Yes it is."

            "They're completely different situations. Jack loves you."

            "And Kim loves you."

            "You don't know that."

            "So…what? You're just going to sit here and slowly sink into abject misery and depression? You're going to keep snapping at Kim and Jack until you push them away completely and you just don't have to deal with it anymore? That's a crap plan, Tony."

            "I don’t have any other choice."

            "Tell Kim. Tell Jack. Maybe they'd appreciate some honesty."

            "So that Kim can ask me to move out? So that I lose both of my best friends and probably get murdered by Jack? No thanks, Chloe."

            "You're pathetic," Chloe sighed as she flopped back against the couch.

            "I know," he mumbled.

            Chloe shrugged. "Don't feel too bad. We both are."

 

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            After Tony had left, Chloe puttered around the apartment, tidying up a little and trying to figure out a way that she could help him. But short of telling everybody the truth, she could see no way out. And she really had no right to be lecturing him on honesty…she had been in love with Jack for almost ten years and she had never made a move.

            A sudden pounding on her door shook her out of her thoughts. Frowning, she moved across the room, startled when an angry Jack Bauer pushed into her apartment the moment she opened the door.

            "Why was Tony here?" he asked, not even bothering to greet her properly.

            "How is that any of your business?" Chloe shot back, her surprise hardening into an anger that matched his.

            "You and Tony aren't friends. Why would he be here?"

            "We are, actually."

            "What?"

            "Friends. Tony and I. We talk. We hang out. I think that makes us friends."

            Some of his anger seemed to seep out of him and Chloe noticed that his shoulders were slumped in defeat. He shook his head before looking at her with sad eyes.

            "Did he tell you? What's bothering him?"

            Chloe sighed. "Yes."

            He looked at her sharply. "He did?"

            "Yes."
            "What is it?"

            She bit her lip. "I can't tell you, Jack."

            "Excuse me?"

            "It's not my place. I told him I wouldn't tell anyone and I intend on keeping that promise."

            "Please, Chloe…" he begged. "I just want to help him."

            She shook her head, trying to ignore the pain in his eyes. "I'm sorry, Jack," she whispered. "I can't. I promised."

            Hanging his head, he moved over to her couch, flopping down in the same spot Tony had occupied earlier.

            "I just don't get it," he sighed.

            "Get what?" she asked softly, sitting next to him.

            "Why he won't tell me. I get the feeling it has to do with Michelle, but he just won't open up…I know what it's like to lose your wife. I could help."

            "Maybe it's not just about Michelle. Maybe he thinks you won't understand," Chloe ventured.

            "Can I just ask you one thing?"

            "You can ask anything Jack. If I can, I'll answer it."

            He stared down at his hands, rubbing his thumb in circles against his other palm. "Is he mad at me? Or Kim?"

            Chloe reached over and took one of his hands in hers, pulling it over to her lap, where she ran her fingers over the back of it. She looked him straight in the eye. "No, Jack. He's not mad at either of you. I can promise you that."

            He stared at their hands for a moment before he leaned back and rested his head on her shoulder.

            "I'm worried about him," he whispered.

            "I know, Jack. I know."

 

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            He was late. And not just by a little bit. They always started movie night around six o'clock, and it was nearing eleven. Kim had ordered the pizza and brought out the beers hours ago, and they still sat on the coffee table, the former cold and the latter warm. She tried not to worry, told herself that he had just gotten held up somewhere, that he would be home any minute with a smile and an apology. But as the night inched toward morning, she knew that something was wrong.

            She must have dozed off. When the door opened, she nearly jumped out of her skin. She stood, staring at him as he stood in the doorway. There was something strange in his eyes, and she didn't like it.

            "Where have you been?" she asked.

            He tore his eyes away from her and closed the door, taking off his jacket and moving to hang it in the closet.

            "Out."

            "Obviously. But it's movie night. I thought you'd be home hours ago."

            He shrugged. "I had other plans."

            Kim hated that he wouldn't look at her, she hated the tone in his voice. There was most definitely something wrong.

            "You could have called."

            "Sorry. I didn't realize I had to clear all my activities with you first."

            She bit her lip to keep from crying. "I just wish you had let me know. You've never missed a movie night."

            "Yeah, well, Kim…did you ever think that maybe I get sick of sitting around with you every Friday night? That maybe I'd like a life of my own?"

            He heard the catch in her breath. He couldn't look up, couldn't meet her eyes – he knew that would be the end of him. Instead he moved down the hall and waited until he was almost to his room before throwing a rough "goodnight" over his shoulder.

            When his door closed, Kim sank onto the couch and cried.

 

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            Tony could hear her sobs through his door, and they were like a knife. He dropped his face into his hands as he sank to the floor, telling himself that he couldn't go back out to her, no matter how much he wanted to comfort her.

 

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            "Hey, sweetheart," Jack greeted as he opened the door to find Kim standing outside.

            She didn't answer him, didn't even raise her eyes to meet her. Frowning, he moved to the side, giving her room to come in. She did, her arms wrapped around herself, and she moved silently into the living room, sinking down onto the couch. Jack took a seat next to her, a hand on her shoulder.

            "Kim, what's wrong?"

            "Tony," she whispered.

            It was then that she looked up. Jack's heart broke as he saw how red her eyes were, how puffy her face was. She must have been crying for hours and he did the only thing he knew to do – he gathered her in his arms and rocked her gently.

            "Oh honey, what happened?"

            She started crying again. "He was so mean, Dad. He just…he was different. His voice was cold and he refused to look at me. When I asked him where he had been, he just shrugged it off, like I was being over sensitive about it. But I just…something's wrong and he won't tell me, Daddy."

            "I know, Kim," he whispered. "He won't tell me either."

            "But we talk about everything…Michelle, Barry, Chase…we don't keep things from each other."

            Jack looked at his daughter closely, taking in how distressed she was. "Kim…" he said slowly. "There's something else, isn't there?"

            She frowned at him, pulling back slightly. "What do you mean?"

            He reached out a shaky hand to brush the hair out of her face. "You…you have feelings for him, don't you? You've fallen for Tony."

            The fear in her eyes shocked him. Her bottom lip trembled and he hurried to reassure her.

            "Honey, that's not a bad thing."

            She looked at him sharply. "It's not?"

            He gave her a soft smile. "No. I should have seen it earlier. You guys spend all your time together…you make each other laugh…it all makes sense now."

            "You're not mad?"

            He shook his head. "No. I'll admit it's…weird. A little. But if he makes you happy, Kim…that's all that matters."

            She laid her head on his shoulder. "But he doesn't feel the same way, Daddy. You should have heard him last night. He wanted nothing to do with me."

            Jack sighed. "Yeah, well. I think I understand what's been bothering him now."
            "You do?"

            "Yeah. Let me talk to him."

            "Dad, no…"

            "Not as your father, Kim. As his friend. I can tell him that I figured out what's wrong and that he needs to knock it off."

            "Can you tell me? What's bothering him?"

            "Let me talk to him first, sweetheart. Don't worry. I think we can fix this."

            "I don't want to lose him," she whispered.

            He hugged her against him. "You won't, baby."

 

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            Kim felt better after talking to her father, and as she let herself into her apartment, she decided to look in on Tony and at least try to talk to him. Even if he pushed her away again, she resolved to not be discouraged. He was her best friend and she wasn't going to walk away just because he hurt her feelings.

            When she opened the door to his room, her heart immediately dropped into her stomach like a lead weight. His things were gone, and there was a note on the bed.

            "I'm sorry," was all it said.